Teeth plaque scraping device

I bought this fancy toothpaste recently, well my wife bought it, and the first time I used it was after a serious red wine appreciation society meeting with myself. My teeth had been dyed black from the 2 and a half bottles of Wally’s Hut. (Cheap Aussie Gut Rot that gets you there, I like the Merlot myself) I’d appreciated it so much that I woke up on the couch at 3 o’clock in the morning, in the middle of a crucial episode of Prisoner Cell Block H.

Anyway I was off to a wedding that day and, cripes indeed I looked like Shane Macgowan as I stared in the mirrored abyss, that resembled myself if I was about a hundred years old. Then like magic this stuff: OralB Toothpaste I’m currently using took off the nasty blackness, returning my gnashers to their best tobbaccoy yellow.

However I still have these black lines between the gum and the base of the teeth I’d like to clean. Years ago, a dentist in Millstreet told me that this black stuff was a sign of healthy teeth, can you believe it?

In my moment of inspiration, I said to my wife, shouldnt there be something I could use to scrape this black shit off? Yes she answered “The Dentist” and indeed she is right and I’ve had my teeth scraped occasionally by said same profession. But what if I just want to scrape the shit off in an emergency? like trying to make my smile come out nice in the inevitable photos.

So I propose a scraping device we can sell to people with black plaque lines on their teeth, which will suffice for photos at least.

Ok I’m not the first

Still look at my teeth. Could someone please buy one and send it to me?


About flyflaps

In the end there was only two of us left.
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